But friends, this is patently absurd.
It goes against reason!
Behind that mockingly nonsensical moniker sleeps an eldritch truth of such gravity it would make Gandalf spill his mead.
Friends, the Rock Paper Shotgun isreal.
And in this endeavour, I will naturally need your aid.
Here is how I think everything really happened back in 1872, theactualyear RPS was founded.
Emerging from the heartwoods, the foursome found themselves upon the green and hallowed shores of Loch Arthur.
“A talking horse - witchcraft!”
shrieked Meerjohn, seizing the Shotgun and firing wildly.
There is but one course of action: we must reforge it.
We must reforge the Rock Paper Shotgun.
But of which rock, which paper and which shotgun should this implement of wonder be constructed?
When it comes to the Rock, there are many possible candidates.
I would love to wield a shotgun made of puzzle game materials.
It’s an appealing kind of blasphemy, like making a pancake out of caviar.
But I do wonder about the ballistic potential of symbol-ridden pendants.
Not having ever owned one myself, I strongly suspect the original pendants were actually plastic.
Not for Sin the diamond and obsidian ordnance of so-called “civilisation”.
She generally made do with a humble stone axe.
Very well then, our Rock shall be Minecraft’s stone.
Paper is a harder one.
RPS is made of pure electricity, after all.
However, therearetimes when RPS writers have dabbled in the art of tree-mulching.
Still, perhaps we don’t need to be that literal.
They’re worth the effort.
Lastly, the Shotgun element of the Rock Paper Shotgun.
This is also a tricky question, but for reasons ofabundance, not scarcity.
There are as many shotguns as there are first-person shooters.
I guess I could go for an obvious headliner, like DOOM’s boomstick.
But I am peculiarly compelled by the shotgun you find in Sons OfThe Forest.
How in keeping with the spirit of corporate acquisitions!
The Shotgun Of The Forest it is.
While you do that, I’ll be preoccupying myself with the challenge of combining them.
Has anybody here ever actuallymadea shotgun?
I wouldn’t put it past you all.
