So what’s a 21st-century cyberpunk to wear?
William Gibson’s iconic ‘razorgirl’ mercenary Molly Millions has surgically implanted mirrorshades.
Countless characters in dystopian video games and trash novels and B movies and tabletop RPGs wear mirrorshades.
Mirrorshades are a powerful accessory.
On a practical level, they’re defensive.
Mirrorshades also protect you from the retinal scans of The Man and His many drones and spycams.
They’re emotionally defensive too.
Eyes are windows to the soul, they say, and you refuse to make a connection.
Let no one meet your eye (and certainly not know if you’re about to cry).
When someone looks at you, they see only themself staring back.
When you don mirrorshades, you’re standing behind a one-way mirror with the world as your interrogation room.
But I fear mirrorshades may have become unsafe.
I did not realise I was exposing myself while I proffered l33t greetz.
I had not considered the reflections in my mirrorshades.
Anyone could have seen my monitor and desk.
They could have seen blueprints and documents detailing plans.
Read my private communications and intimate memoranda.
Spotted letters and receipts giving away my location or routine.
Which, for the record, I never would.
To not wear any form of shades would be uncool so let’s consider alternatives.
Matte black shades
If reflections are out, the opposite could work.
It’s a small and simple solution.
Find your favourite frames with matte black lenses and surely you’re good.
Like zebra stripes or warship dazzle camouflage, for people.
Slam on a pair of cybergoggles and jack into the metaverse!
lol
Mirrorshades
But what if you didn’t change anything?
Sure, mirrorshades are an infosec hazard, but what isn’t these days?
Besides, it’d be wasteful to surrender a perfectly good pair of shades to the kipple.
No, we still need practical solutions to covertly play Soltaire while looking cool during calls.
Not that I ever would.
I won’t lie: today I wore mirrorshades to my video meetings, same as every Cyber Monday.
I haven’t changed anything.
Today is a day for tradition.
Just as Christmas calls for mince pies andMariah, Cyber Monday to me means mirrorshades andMindphaser.
Though now that I have written this, my colleagues know that I know that they know.
I might need to rethink my eyewear for Cyber Monday 2023.
Any other solutions come to mind, reader dear?
